The past few Halloweens haven’t felt the same. 

Children still race around collecting candy,

and I wonder if I’m to blame. 


I’m still in a costume as I walk home.

I’m wearing my normal clothes.

Barbies, angels, Marios all pass me by. 

The childhood I can’t return to 

is reflected in their eyes.

In their “we’ll be home by 9!”

And I see

the impermanence of youth 

they have yet to realize.


I got home at 7:36.

Stayed in bed listening to music.

Longing for a time

before the costume 

became my permanent disguise.