I wanted to grow up too fast
Always looking ahead and wondering when it would be my turn
I was impatient and oblivious to what my future held
Watching movies about teen romances and late nights on the phone with your best friend
Yet it didn’t occur to me that not everyone had the same plans as I did
Instead of late nights with people I knew
It turned into self loathing and regret over a grade
And that regret turned into sadness wondering why I hadn’t tried harder
Why I didn’t want to try harder
Looking over each individual word and scrap I had lost in the wake
They said that growing up would be fun
That it would be freeing
Yet all I want to do is go back to how things were
I want to go back to when I used to do things for fun
Not because it would help me get into college
I want to go back to the time where I was oblivious to the things around me
When I thought that we would be friends for ever
I wanted to grow up too fast
And now I can’t go back